Outrage!

Gentlemen.

Will the person who deposited a half bottle of Casillero del Diablo in a cleft in a sallow (a female caprea no less) in the Forest of Braydon, north Wiltshire, remove it at once as it is causing considerable offence and may be interfering with the over-wintering of iris.

As those of us of the Second Covenant will know, when The Almighty performed his inaugural miracle he did not turn the water into an insult to wine (as above) but into at the very least a good ordinary claret.

Meanwhile, iris has mostly wandered off into hibernation (three out of 20 larvae were still on leaves yesterday). Unfortunately, the larvae seem to have been stimulated by unseasonally warm weather into wandering a long way prior to settling down, and are therefore going to be extremely hard to find in hibernation this winter. With only a small sample size to start with, the one thing I needed this autumn was cold weather at the start of November, to prevent larvae from moving far from their feeding leaves. A miracle is needed to retrieve the situation.

M