The Purple Manifesto

The People of Purple Persuasion have launched their manifesto for the General Erection on June 8th.  

Some of it's key points are:-

*  All low grade agricultural land to be rewilded (Agricultural land is graded 1-5: Grades1 and 2 are good food production land, 3 is dodgy, 4 and 5 shouldn't be farmed at all - but are, ruthlessly).

*  Sallow thickets to be established throughout lowland Britain, in town and country.

* Flail cutters abolished.

*  Purple Emperor populations to be established in every English county by 2020 (this is a key part of our 2020 Vision).

*  CRoW Act to be revised to include access to all woods and forests.

*  Forestry Commission to be replaced by Sallow & Wood Fuel UK.

*  Removal of all non-native conifers from the UK by 2020 (c/f our 2020 Vision).

*  White Stork nests on every chimney.

*  Month long national holiday during the Purple Emperor season (which this year may well kick off on June 8th).

*  Four day working week for all.  Middle day of the three day weekend to be quiet - no noisy machines, and blue light traffic only.

*  Abolition of all forms of corporate bollocks.  

*  Chelsea & Arsenal abolished.

* Education: academic year to be reset, to begin in January with exams in November - this frees up the summer term.  Resetting is to be achieved by a one-off sabbatical term for all, during which people can read Heslop.   

Feel free to add more...